


Jay

by Youwerenevermeanttofeelalone



Category: DC Comics
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends With Benefits, holiday fic, mentions of sex but no sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:41:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21729229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Youwerenevermeanttofeelalone/pseuds/Youwerenevermeanttofeelalone
Summary: You find yourself having to take your friend with benefits to the family’s Christmas party as your boyfriend.
Relationships: Jason Todd/Plus Size Reader, Jason Todd/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 194





	Jay

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at @youwerenevermeanttofeelalone

The pounding on his head mirrored the one resonating all over the apartment. Burying his face on the pillow, Jason decided to try and sleep it off. He was getting pulled back to sleep, with the warmth of the body beside him and the darkness provided by his position, when the pounding got louder. 

You stirred awake as he sat up, confused as to where the noise was coming from. Throwing you a sideways glance, he murmured, “go back to sleep, I’ll check.”

Jason slid into a pair of sweatpants from the stack he kept at your place and snatched one of your t-shirts. At any other moment, he would’ve thought of putting his boots on or something, but he was more annoyed than worried. His plans of waking up late and then waking you up with some good ol’ oral sex had been ruined, again. 

The pounding was repeated twice as he crossed the living room, making him roll his eyes. Swinging the door open, he found a confused woman staring up at him. 

“Who are you?” she asked, trying to get a peek inside of the apartment.

He asked her the same, taking the vaguely familiar face in. “Can I help you with anything?” He stirred, more tired than he imagined to be. 

“I’m here to visit my daughter.”

So that’s why the face was familiar! He immediately stepped to the side, “I’ll wake her up,” he assured, guiding your mom to the living room. 

He sat down on the edge of the bed, slightly shaking you to wake you up. You curled up, opening your eyes slowly. “What’s up, Jay?”

“Your mom’s in the living room,” he whispered, trying not to laugh at how your eyes looked like they would pop out. 

“Shit.” You scrambled out of the bed, shivering due to the contrast in temperature. 

Jason followed your steps with his eyes, checking you out like he always did. Doing that only reminded him about his ruined plans, but whatever. You were struggling to put your jeans on, too stressed by your mom’s presence, Jason’s very calm reaction, and the lack of caffeine in your system. 

As he put his boots on, you fixed your hair up in a bun that didn’t look as good as you wanted it to but was definitely better than your mom seeing your sex hair. 

You patted Jason’s arm before leaving the bedroom, hoping your mom wouldn’t make questions. Finding her already in the kitchen, making coffee, you kissed her cheek and offered to take it from there. 

She swatted a hand, “I’ve got it.”

“I didn’t know you were coming,” you commented. In all honesty, you were confused by her presence, she usually called to let you know— your dad usually went with her too. “Where’s dad?”

Your mom laughed, “you should be glad your father didn’t come.” Turning around, she thrust a mug into your hands. “When were you going to tell us you had a boyfriend?”

You took a sip of coffee. The burn of the hot liquid was nothing compared to the mortification overwhelming you. Jason was everything but your boyfriend, you two were exclusively friends with benefits— and yes, you had a crush on him but it would never happen and now you didn’t know how to explain that to your mom. 

Telling her the truth while not shameful would grant you a long talk about how you needed to change certain things in order to have a formal relationship. You weren’t mentally ready to listen to her, albeit well-meaning, offensive comments. 

A strong arm wrapped around you as you put the mug down on the table, Jason’s warm breath hitting the side of your face as he pressed his front against your backside. “Are you feeling better, babe?” he asked. 

The pet name made your heart skip a beat. He’d sometimes call you a few but only while in bed. You weren’t sure why he had used it, but asking him would be giving it all away. “Yeah, the coffee’s helping.”

“How long have you been dating?” your mom asked, placing a mug next to yours for Jason. 

He answered without even stuttering, “almost two months now,” he used his free hand to take the mug, thanking her with one of his oh so charming smiles.

You just nodded, slipping out of his embrace to move toward the living room. Your mom continued asking questions, mostly demanding to know why hadn’t you told her anything. Your excuse was that you weren’t sure it would turn serious which she seemingly bought. 

Her believing the whole shtick relieved you, it meant you would have a proper conversation with her once Jay left to do whatever he had to do and wouldn’t have to go through the awkwardness of telling the woman who brought you to the world that you were fucking your best friend. 

The relief didn’t last. After Jay left, not before giving you a light kiss on the lips and charming your mom with a comment about how lovely had it been to finally meet her, your mom lifted both eyebrows while looking at you through her eyelashes. 

“What is it?”

She tried not to smile teasingly, “you’ll have to bring him to the family Christmas party, your dad will want to meet him.”

The family Christmas party was your least favorite part of the holidays. The extended family was the problem, really, they didn’t like you and it was mutual. Taking a fake date to it sounded like your worst nightmare, mostly when you were heavily involved with said person and a lot of things could go wrong. 

Jason took it way too calmly when you told him a few nights later. He was standing still as you stitched a wound he had on the stomach, waiting for you to be finished to speak— he knew you too well to dare take your focus away from your main task, mostly when you looked in so much distress. 

You discarded the used antiseptic wipes and the needle in the bathroom’s trash can, opening the faucet to wash your hands. Jason stood on the doorway, watching you. 

“When will the party be?”

You sighed heavily, “next week, Friday.”

“I’ll tell B, then.”

Humming, you splashed some water onto your face. The intrigue as to why he had told your mom you were dating was eating you alive yet you didn’t dare ask anything about it. 

“You need anything else?” you asked, walking toward him in order to leave the bathroom. Jason stared at you, analyzing you, then shook his head and moved out of the way. 

That gesture kept you up after he left. You never questioned most things he did, you knew Jason needed time and patience for everything, you were aware of his trust issues and how scared of commitment he was. The knowledge, however, made the fact that he had lied to your mom about your relationship weirder. 

You were pulling cookies out of the oven when a familiar knock was bestowed upon the front door. Placing the cooking sheets on the counter, you made sure the oven was already off before directing yourself toward the door. 

Cracking said door open, you let Jason walk himself in and make himself comfortable like he always did. He followed you back into the kitchen, extending a hand to take a cookie. 

You slapped his hand, “those are for tomorrow.”

“That’s what you’ll be doing before bed? Cookies?”

You nodded, “I need them to cool down before decorating them. The icing will harden throughout the night and part of the morning if needed.”

He exhaled loudly. You lifted an eyebrow in question. “I thought we would do something else before bed.”

“Help me decorate them and we might.”

Impatiently, Jason waited for the cookies to cool down. He helped to mix the icing, using it as an excuse to get physically closer. You were always happy to have him close to you, needing it as much as he did although for different reasons, you also always let him initiate the contact. 

Surprising no one, he was good at decorating cookies. By the third one, he was already taking liberties that you loved. Seeing Jason act like the young man he was, cracking jokes while icing cookies and laughing when both of you ended up with food coloring all over your hands, was refreshing and endearing. It was a side of him you were privileged to get to see, taking it for granted would’ve been stupid on your behalf— that was one of the reasons why you hid your romantic feelings from him. You treasured his friendship way too much, so much you’d still want him around even if you hadn’t been having sex a couple of times a week for the past four months. 

You were laughing at his pout, washing your hands to get rid of the food coloring and the icing you had squeezed onto your hand to smear it on his face. Jason trapped you between his front and the sink, nuzzling the dirty side of his head against yours. 

“Todd!” you whined, using your wet hand to wash the icing off. He laughed behind you, the vibrations making thrills run down your spine. 

You wiggled your body, enough to stand with your side against his front. Wetting your hand once again, you wiped his cheek too, rinsing it and wiping again until his handsome face was clean. 

He dipped his head, eyes focused on your mouth. Looking up, you waited for him to lean closer to kiss him. His arms curled around your hips, mouth heavy against yours as he pressed you as closer to him as possible. You snaked your arm around his waist, deepening the kiss. 

Hands sliding to your ass, he gripped it as he turned you to face him completely so he could feel you up properly. Your free palm groped his bicep, tongue swiping over his bottom lip. Jason opened his mouth to welcome your tongue, his harsh breath against your face making you feel way too hot. 

His hips pushed upward, the contrast between the denim of his jeans with the cotton of your pajama pants making you gasp. Bitting your bottom lip, he pulled on it before letting it go and dropping his head onto your shoulder. Facing your neck, he caught his breath on your skin for a few seconds before latching his mouth onto your neck. 

“Don’t leave marks, Jay,” you said breathily with your hands all over his back. 

With Jason’s arm draped around your waist, you distractedly stared at the wall. He was sleeping, something you should’ve been doing too. Your mind was reeling, his touch, his smell, his voice... everything about him drove you crazy. At first, you had assumed it was because he accepted you like you were which would’ve been sadder and easier at the same time. The entire truth was you had fallen for him between long nights of laughs, shared secrets, and silent crying moments that one time turned into a sexual encounter. Jason made you feel desired and respected, it should’ve been enough. But there were nights like that one, with his arm around you and face hidden on your back that you wondered how would it be to hold his hand, kiss him just because you could, holding him close at night in a purely chaste way— you wondered how would it feel to be loved by him. 

Your yearning made you remember you’d have to introduce him to your entire family as your boyfriend. Your dad would like him, you knew because in some ways he was what your father had taught you to look for in a partner back when you were in high school and got your heart broken for the first time. Jason would of course charm every single one of your aunts and amuse your uncles— your cousins would love him, as you did. 

You left the bed quietly in the morning, letting him sleep in as much as he wanted. With a cup of coffee in hand, you sat on the couch and scrolled down Instagram, liking a few photos here and there and leaving comments on your friends’ posts. 

Ever since you were a kid you had needed to prepare mentally for family gatherings. Someone would always say something fatphobic, you needed to be ready and you needed to remind yourself to not let it get to you. You didn’t know if you would be able to take it with Jason there, there were only two things that could happen: he’d either get angry and try to fight them or he’d wait for you two to be alone to ask why hadn’t you told him about that. None of those were ideal. 

Ringing the doorbell, you took a deep breath. Your dad immediately opened the door, pulling you in a bear hug. Hugging him back, you allowed yourself to breathe in and out. Your dad greeted Jason as soon as the hug ended, shaking his hand. 

You let them introduce themselves, walking a few meters to hand the cookies to your mom and hug her. A few of your relatives greeted you too, making small talk and asking if it was true you were finally dating someone. 

You could feel the burn of Jason’s eyes on the back of your head as you were greeted by your least disliked aunt. You had avoided telling him not all your relatives were interested in you, mostly because you knew he’d advise you to skip the party. In contrast, they were very curious about him. 

Jason had them all in his pocket, making them laugh and entertaining the kids with their toys. When asked if he was happy with you, his eyes again fixed on your face. Jason gave you the biggest smile you had ever seen from him, the steel blue of his eyes shining so brightly that he looked younger. “I’ve never been happier,” he said it in such a way you would’ve thought it to be earnest if you didn’t know the real terms of your relationship. 

You smiled back, it probably not reaching your eyes. How could it? His words were a reminder you had tried to avoid for the past week, the sobering truth of how sad the situation was becoming. Deciding to help in the kitchen to avoid thinking about it, you excused yourself.

The music in the background made you feel like The Grinch. You were extremely annoyed by the Christmas themed things that year, mostly the songs with romantic connotations. Romance had always been a fickle thing, you’d jump from loving the idea of romantic love to hate it in mere hours— you couldn’t be blamed and you were fucking tired of doing it. 

You wanted to go home, watch a sad movie and get over the gloominess the fact that by Christmas Eve you’d have to make up an excuse as to why your charming boyfriend, the one letting your little niece climb his back while paying attention to the same boring story your aunt always told, wasn’t your boyfriend anymore was causing you. 

Unfortunately, there wasn’t much to do in the kitchen at a party where everyone brought something. You avoided going back to the living room, preferring to watch the kids play in the patio from the doorway. 

Their laughter was less annoying, probably because they were kids, more sincere as they ran and made rules for their games. Rules were, in fact, such a fundamental part of most things in life that your heart dropped when the realization of Jason and you never setting even one for your dynamic sunk in. 

By dinner time you didn’t think you’d be able to open your mouth without throwing up. Not eating would gain you comments you weren’t capable of taking lightly that night, and eating would grant you questions about your eating habits. There was nothing that could go right for you that evening, you had to accept it and keep it all in for a few more hours.

You ate reluctantly, chewing way slower than usual and drinking as much water as possible. Jason’s hand was on your thigh, rubbing circles with his thumb as if he knew something was wrong. He probably did, he was intuitive and smart after all. You hoped he didn’t know the reason behind your tense state, or that if he did he’d just let it go. 

Losing Jason was something you couldn’t afford, not after having had the taste of being close to someone as kind-hearted and hard-headed. He wasn’t perfect by any means, you liked that he owned up to that, yet he strived to do what was right every single day— or better said night. He was after your parents the most important person in your life, the one from whom you had learned the most. 

You cried yourself to sleep that night, feeling once again like a child who had been told harshly to lose weight. This time was different, the rejection from a few members of your family was the norm, you knew you would never please them and you didn’t want to anymore, it just hurt because no one should go through that. It hurt even more to know that even though Jason didn’t have a problem with your body and in fact often lusted after it there was nothing else in the romantic sense there. It hurt because you were used to the opposite, of being told that it’d be fixed if you changed your body. 

Not seeing him for a few days was torture. You wondered briefly if it was because you needed some type of comfort or simply because you missed him, then came to the conclusion that the reason didn’t matter.

You expected to see him again at night, to either patch him up or suck him off after a long patrol. To your surprise he visited one morning, arriving with everything he needed to make his famous pancakes. Letting him make the kitchen his, you curled up on the couch with a warm blanket to watch a movie while he cooked. 

It was something common between you two, doing different things in the same place. It was simply more comfortable to do it at your apartment than at his because Roy loved teasing you about resembling a married couple. 

Idle chat was shared while taking the meal, work and family matters were the usual topics. There was something he wasn’t telling you, it was obvious by the way he didn’t hold your gaze and how quickly he found an excuse to get up from the table. 

Drying the dishes after he washed them, you asked about Roy to break the silence. 

“You like Roy or something?” 

You frowned, shaking your head. “Why?”

“I dunno,” he shrugged, taking the plates from your hands to store them. “You always ask about him.”

“Because he’s my friend.”

Jason hummed, closing the cupboard without another word. He didn’t move and you didn’t either, not knowing what to do nor say. 

The day was too cold for you to be wearing a long-sleeved thin t-shirt and that was your excuse to go into your room and have an alone moment. You stood in front of the open closet, staring at noting as your mind went through everything you could’ve done for Jason to suddenly be so hot and cold. 

You didn’t hear him enter the room, didn’t feel him stand just beside you. You didn’t pay enough attention to the way he was worriedly looking at you. Actually, if you asked Jason, you never paid enough attention to anything he did. It was one of the few annoying things about you, how dense you could be. 

He cleared his throat in an attempt to gain your attention. It did the trick; before turning to your side and acknowledging him, you snatched a sweatshirt from the closet and slipped it over your body. 

“You okay?” He asked, watching you carefully. 

“Just cold.” Not a lie, but a pathetic excuse. 

Jason opened his arms wide for you, his heart clenching when you hesitated. You’d never done that, you had never hugged him so lightly either. Your touch now instead of firm was feathery, your body not flush against his, you weren’t trailing your fingers up his back nor biceps, your head wasn’t on his chest. 

He didn’t want to ask yet knew he had to. “Why have you been rejecting me so much lately?”

Parting completely from him, you tried to understand why he would be asking that. His face wasn’t easy to read which meant he didn’t want you to. “I haven’t rejected you, Jason.”

“See? Since when am I Jason and not Jay?” he countered, crossing his arms against his chest. 

Confused, you still apologized, your intention not having been to hurt him. “I’m not rejecting you, Jay. We just had breakfast together.”

He huffed. His hand moved upward to his head, fingers messing with his hair. You recognize the action as a frustrated one. 

“Did your family hate me?”

“What?” Of course not!”

“Then?” He walked back to sit down on the bed, his eyes never leaving you. 

“Jay,” you breathed out, “I just told you I’m not rejecting you. I’m sorry if it looked like that.”

“You ignored me last Friday, didn’t call for almost a week, you’ve been way too quiet and now you didn’t even hug me like you always do.” 

Bobbing your mouth open, you shook your head. “It—it was not intentional, okay?” 

He didn’t believe you, the look on his face was obvious. Jason was annoyed and hurt, and he wanted you to know it. Approaching him slowly, you stared down at him in search for permission to touch him. 

Sighing, he uncrossed his arms. “If it wasn’t intentional, why didn’t you tell me that you were having bad days or something?”

You shrugged, abashed. On Friday you didn’t say anything because there was no point, the following days you kept yourself from calling because you needed time. And now, now you were contemplating telling him the truth or at least changing your dynamic with him. 

“Why did you tell my mom we were dating?” you asked, wanting to know before going one way or another. 

He frowned, “because we are. Is that why you’re mad?”

“Excuse me?” you squealed, “since when are we dating, Jason?”

Jason looked up at you due to the difference from your standing stance and his sat down position. Opening his palms, he waited for you to drop yours on top of them. Intertwining his fingers with yours, he pulled you closer. “I didn’t think I had to ask,” he rasped, wetting his lips, “I just thought we were, I don’t— I assumed we were dating like the third time I stayed over after having sex.”

You let his words sink in, gripping his hands as tightly as you could. Things started to make sense, like your dynamic not having rules, or how he walked in and out of the apartment as if he lived there too, or his reaction when you told him you didn’t like Roy’s teasing...

The fact that your distress had been for nothing amused you so much you started giggling, sliding your hands from his grip and throwing your arms around his shoulders you continued laughing. He hugged you by the waist, pulling you even closer. Your laughter, as it got louder, turned very contagious. Now both of you were shaking out of laughter, against each other’s bodies. 

“What’s so funny, huh?”

You peppered kisses all over his face, smiling when he chuckled. “I kind of felt like shit last Friday because you were just my fake boyfriend.”

“Shit. Babe,” he tightened his arms around you, “I’m sorry for just assuming, okay? We can start over again if you want?”

You shook your head, locking your lips with his. It felt so nice, doing it because you wanted just a kiss. “It’s okay, boyfriend.”

“Can we cuddle now, girlfriend?” he teased back, his lips dragging a little down to your jaw. 

As soon as you nodded, he brought you down onto the bed with him, Jason on his back while you shifted your weight. He snorted, “you’re not going to hurt me.”

“Can’t risk it, Jay.”

Jason ignored your comment, pulling you flush on top of his body. “You’re too stubborn.”

“You like me because of that,” you joked, nuzzling your head on his sweater. 

He hummed, his hands rubbing your back and side respectively to warm you up. “It’s in the top three reasons why I love you.”

“Did Jason Todd really use the L-word?” maybe teasing him wasn’t the best idea in the world, but you genuinely didn’t want to get your hopes up. You were lucky already by being reciprocated to an extent, mostly after how much distress you had been under because of your view of it. 

He fixed the position of his neck to look at you. The depth of his eyes swallowed yours as he gazed into them, and before he said it you knew what he’d say and you knew because once again he was comfortable with you being aware of it. “Yeah, I’m in love with you.”


End file.
